Men Are Losers

Sounds sexist, doesn’t it?  But any woman who has attempted to lose weight has looked at her husband or boyfriend in envy.  Let’s face it.  Men shed pounds over night while women gain pounds just driving past a bakery.  It’s not sexist.  It’s just the cold hard truth, however desperately unfair it might be.  Men are natural losers.

Instead of drowning our sorrows over this injustice in a tub of cookie dough ice cream, we should emulate them.  Let’s learn from them ladies.

Men have muscle. Men’s bodies are just different than women’s.  Men have greater muscle mass, which causes them to burn up to 30% more calories.  Women in turn have more body fat, and they are biologically programmed to store it. 

What can we do about it?  Hit the weights!  At the gym, men flock to the weight racks while women plod along on the cardio equipment.  This approach to weight loss doesn’t do our bodies any favors.  Weight training helps women increase muscle mass and therefore speed up metabolism.  Don’t fear the free weights, ladies. 

Men lift heavy.  Women who do wander over to the weight racks tend to pick a light weight and an exercise they can do with perfect form, probably isolating one muscle.  They kid themselves thinking they are just “toning”.  The problem is they aren’t doing their muscles much good. 

Men on the other hand, pick an exercise that allows them to grab the biggest, most impressive-looking weights.  The result: muscle building in less time, and working groups of muscles at once instead of one in isolation.  Drop the baby weights and pick up something heavier, poundage that makes you strain to do 8-10 repetitions.  Once your body adapts to 10 repetitions, increase the weight until you are only able to squeeze out 3.  Worried about “bulking up”?  Lou Schuler, a certified strength and conditioning specialist and author of The New Rules of Lifting has this to say: "At sports medicine conferences, I've seen scans of women's upper arms before and after this kind of training program, and the girth of their upper arms hasn't changed, but you can see the fat tissue is reduced and how much more muscle there is."

Men crave meat.  While women reach for chocolate bars and sweet gooey baked goods for our comfort foods, men turn to meat.  Meat is protein, and protein helps create a feeling of fullness which prevents overeating later.  The same can’t be said about a sticky bun.  If sweets are your dietary Achilles’ heel, when the cravings come on reach for some lean protein first.  Some easy grabs are low-fat string cheese or cottage cheese and fresh berries. 

Men are not perfectionists.  When women diet, they charge head first into perfection, vowing never to consume soda or candy or anything fattening ever again.  We deprive ourselves until we just can’t stand it any longer.  Then we scarf down everything on the cookie aisle at the grocery store, wallowing in guilt and misery for several days afterward. 

Men are less complicated.  They’ll still enjoy some of their favorite foods, just in smaller portions.  Can you imagine a guy giving up beer and nachos FOREVER?  That’s because they don’t.  A man is far more likely to adopt an “all things in moderation” mindset, and research suggests this approach is far more successful long-term. 

The lesson:  Don’t ban your favorite foods.  Nothing can ruin your good intentions like feeling deprived.  It’s okay to have a small cupcake or scoop of ice cream once a week.  Just don’t overdo it.

Men don’t use food as therapy.  Not only are women twice as likely to suffer from depression as men, they are also more likely to attempt to soothe that depression with food.  A bad day makes many women over-eat, which leads to the downward spiral of guilt and self-loathing, which leads to more over-eating, which leads to more….you get the idea.  Men tend to lean more towards physical activity when they are stressed or need to dissipate negative emotions.  They may go for a hard run or pound nails or tinker in the garage.  So instead of swallowing your feelings along with a dozen doughnuts, get up and get active.  Take a kickboxing class, go for a brisk walk, or take out frustrations on the weights at the gym.

So if you want to shed pounds like a man, it’s okay to emulate some of their behaviors.  I’m all about female empowerment and embracing our differences, but if it helps the “fairer” gender adopt healthier habits, let’s learn from the losers.  (Sorry guys.  I couldn’t resist that little jab.)

Comments

[Mike P]

Spot on with this post. Whenever I exhibit anything that resembles common sense with my diet, the pounds disappear quickly. I like the heavier weights, am a carnivore at heart, and the only 6-pack I feel necessary to ever have again can be purchased in my grocery store beer aisle. If my blood pressure is decent, and I more resemble a "V" than an "O"...then I've accomplished all I need to accomplish.

I will say that I have occasionally used food as therapy, though. It's part of that instant self-gratification pattern people sometimes get into. No problem can't be fixed (or ignored) quicker than with a #2 with cheese.